London’s rhapsody

This could be the end

This could be the end

This could be the end

This could be the end

‘Cause I ain’t got a home

This so very true lyrics are coming from my computer. Today I’m trying to consolidate my stuff at the appartment apartment where we lived together. I still have to come in September again, to actually pick up my stuff and get it to Bath somehow, but I guess this is the end.

Are you one of those people who hate packing? I am indeed. And that is probably the reason why I’m going to move every year, starting in September. One friend of mine said (Hello Bety!), twenties are the time, when people don’t really have home. As far as I’m concerned, that is ok. But I’m definitely not ok with the fact that annually I will have to go through all my belongings and place them somewhere else.

I think I will have to persuade myself that it is actually a CATHARTIC PROCESS. It should be healthy then, right?

Actually, it made me realised how little I need to live. As buddhism teaches it is not good to be attached to possession. Clever buddhists.

So, are you packing for holidays? And do you like it?

Here’s the song I was talking about.


On Loss

We can’t break free from loss.

And it hurts. I know it’s nothing new under the sun, but during the time when the losses are minor I tend to forgot how it feels to loose something precious. This time, the something was someone. And oh yes. It hurts.

I hoped, that the rationale that this loss had a greater purpose and is a part of the ‘Plan’, and that I’m content with the situation, would help me to feel less pain. But it does not help. I wonder If anything would help? Maybe people just must live through their losses and maybe that old, pretty much culturally universal, saying, that what doesn’t kill you just makes you stronger, is actually true.

The simplicity and easiness of cutting the bond are the scariest from all. Just with a word. Done. Bye.

It’s so sad. The knowledge that now you’re being erased from someones life.

Because that’s what survivors do.

I’m not a survivor like that. I only respect that.

Well boys and girls,the dream must go on and I’m sure that future losses will be even more painful. Yipee!

I wanted to find some song, that would be just right, but I didn’t. So, I’ll finish today with a song he hated in the version he’d like.